Keshani & Collan: A little problem

[Keshani]

"I'm....not you." She responded back, maybe with a bit more force than she meant. "Everyone here seems to think that I'm someone I'm not - you, this girl Mariah....I'm not any of those people and when you all realize that it's all gonna be over."

There were a few tears in her eyes as she pushed ahead oof him heading for the medway. She knew she couldn't get away from him - she still had to get the implant out somehow. But she DID want to escape all of these expectations every one seemed to have of her...

[Collan]

Collan held up his hands, "I didn't mean to say you and I were alike. I'm saying you're selling yourself short. Look at what you have done. Take an honest look. Where did you come from? Where are you now? What did you do?"

He gave her a visual once-over.

"I know what fear looks like. You still did what you had to. There's to you than what you think."

Collan smiled.

[Keshani]

Her eyes narrowed a bit, but she calmed down.

She stood there studying him for a minute, as if trying to decide something.

Finally she asked, obviously trying to sound non chalana,

"Can these Jedi use this Force to affect people's minds? "

[Collan]

And there it was.

"Yes. Though some things are easir than others."

[Keshani]

"So how can you trust being around them if they can do that?"

[Collan]

"Mostly because the most they can do to someone with a strong mind is affect their emotional state," Collan's comment was deliberately pointed. He had a guess as to how Keshani had become so calm and it involved Ch'lana.

"And, I just thought of it. Have you ever felt...in a the back of your head, like some thing or someone has your back? Even though, there was no one around."

[Keshani]

She opened her mouth to retort that no one had EVER had her back but herself; that she had always had to watch out for herself. But she stopped.

Everything had seemed to change after meeting this group. And there had definitely been times on the station where, even if she hadn't wanted them to, they HAD fought to protect her.

Realizing her mouth was hanging open as she thought about this she closed it abruptly.

"I....don't know", she finally got out, rather lamely

[Collan]

Collan gave her an appraising look, trying his best to look inside her head and guess at what she was thinking. Her hesistation indicated uncertainty and maybe she was thinking of something but didn't want to admit it. Either to him or even to herself.

"Tell you what, how good are you at focusing and clearing your mind?" If she was anything like him, his experience as a slave, he'd been able to go away a little bit.

[Keshani]

She took a slow breath and let it out before answering. How good was she at clearing her mind?

The feeling of calm that had stayed with her throughout the time on the station during their fight to free the senators and escape came back to her. It had felt so good to not have all of the pain and fear that had basically been at the root of her being for so long.

It had been like some heavy weight had been released from her. But now it was back.....

Jedi can affect the emotional state of beings....

Collan had confirmed her suspicions of what had happened before.

But he was learning to be a Jedi as well. Why did he want her to clear her mind now? Was he going to do something else to her?

"Why?" She asked, suspicion creeping into her voice?

[Collan]

"Because if you can, you might able to find that feeling. I could feel it, just as we entered the prison complex on the station. I feel buoyed by a power beyond myself, but I know what it felt like already. And I got the feeling it wasn't just me."

[Keshani]

"Oh.", she replied, chewing on her lip a bit as they walked toward the medbay.

"Can only full jedi do that thing with affecting peoples emotions?"

Her expression was guarded. It was difficult to at least outwardly tell why she was asking the question.

[Collan]

"Depends on what you mean by a 'jull Jedi. I don't know how...it's called a 'mind trick.' You have know how to use the Force to change the world around you and I can barely make something move."

"But if you mean do you have to be a fully trained Jedi Knight...the answer is no."

Collan's expression was neutral, trying to figure out where Keshani was going with this.

[Keshani]

"Oh." Was all that she said in answer. Was there a hint of disappointment in her voice or was it just his imagination?

"I guess we should go get this thing out..."

[Collan]

Collan said, "Sure but before we go. I get the sense there is something else behind your words. I can't read your thoughts but I can hear in your voice...something odd."

"What are you really trying to ask?"

[Keshani]

She tried to shrug it off.

"It's nothing...not important."

Again an abrupt attempt to change the subject. "So what's on Kashyyok? (Sorry...awful spelling)"