Decisions

[Keshani]

"Not if people don't want me to."

[GM Craig]

She lets go of your hands and gets to her feet. She starts pacing, mumbling to herself.

Then she turns to you, and holds out her hands, palms out. Her eyes are hard, like she is struggling with something. "Look, Kesh, I'm trying here. I really am. But you keep focusing on what other people, instead of what options are open to you. I can't stay with you. OK? Not for very long. But you have a galaxy of opportunity in front of you. You just have to take it."

[Keshani]

She sat for a minute, seemingly lost in thought. She had no idea how to decide what direction to go.

"Do you think I could like do all three things? Go stay someplace, help Trax when he needs it and help Collan and Niil and stuff like on an on-call basis?"

She chewed her lip a bit.

"The thing is...Collan kinda....scares....me a bit. That's not really the best word, though. Just...like...he thinks he knows what's best for me. But he doesn't even know me. He just knows what he THINKS I am based on what HE has been..." she shrugged, feeling awkward.

[GM Craig]

That seems to bring her back, and she smirks at you. "Yeah, he's a bit of a shabuir. But he's trying to get better. You just need to tell him when he's crossed a personal boundary, and call him on his drek."

She sighs, but she's giving you a half smile when she does. "Yeah, you can do all those things, Keshani. This isn't a rocket tram you're choosing, where you can't change cars mid-trip. You can help Trax when he needs it, be there to help out Collan and Niil." She shrugs. "Seems to me the best way to do that is with the rebellion. Then they could send you where you needed, and where you wanted to go, you know? it sounds pretty loose and flexible, so I bet there'd be lots of opportunity to do your own thing too."

The smile grows. "And you'd still have a warm bed and servants and three meals a day at the Organa estate. Best of all worlds."

[Keshani]

"But then would I see you? "

[GM Craig]

"You're gonna see me anyway. I can't stay with you for long, but that doesn't mean we won't see each other, okay?"

[Keshani]

She nodded. But instead of staying curled up on the floor she found herself reaching for Maris, wrapping her arms around her in a tight hug.

"Thanks" she said softly. She wanted to elaborate more, bUT she couldn't find the words. She hoped Maris would understand anyway.

[GM Craig]

Maris looks uncomfortable, but after a couple of seconds, Keshani feels the zabrak's arms return the embrace. A moment later, she feels a soft pressure on the top of her head - a cheek? Or a kiss?

After a moment, Maris backs off.

"So, what's it going to be? It doesn't have to be the full decision right now, but the ships are leaving. Are you going to Alderaan, or off with the old guy?"

She pauses. "And do you want me to get you set up like I offered? Or you got something else in mind maybe?"

[Keshani]

"I think I'll head towards Alderaan for right now...I'd like to find someone who can teach me some more things about tech stuff, ya know? It was kind of.....fun...on the station rigging things to blow up and stuff, but I'm still a super amateur. I would like to find someone who can help me learn....

She frowned for a minute.

"I want to be able to pay my own way though. I don't want to be a burden on anyone and I don't want to be dead weight or whatever. So yeah, if you could help set me up with something that I can make some of my own credits doing...."

[GM Craig]

She frowns. "I can't do that on Alderaan, but I'm sure the Senator can handle the arrangements there. And I'm sure if you told Organa you didn't want to be a burden, he'd tell you you could do nothing but eat air Cake for the rest of your life, and he'd still owe you two lifetimes worth of debt. He can hire techs, find you work, protect you from the Empire. He's got money. Like more wealth than you could even imagine, and that wealth buys power and safety."

[Keshani]

"But I don't WANT to live off someone else's money. No one owes me anything. I don't want to owe anyone else anything..."

This idea seemed really important to her for some reason. She did NOT want to have to depend on others....

She chewed her lip again, a sinking feeling in her stomach. "Maybe going to Alderaan isn't such a good idea after all."

Why was it so frelling hard to decide what she wanted to do?

She wished someone would just tell her what to do...

[GM Craig]

Maris shrugs, and leans back against a crate. "Well, its a good place to start, no matter what. I guess I'mm come with you, at least until we get you started out on something. Just... uh..."

She hesitates.

"I know you like Trax and all, but I can't be around him. We do not get along. So when you're with him, I'll make myself scarce. Better for everyone. I'll be in my hole if you want to talk to me, but I won't be wandering the ship, ok?"

[Keshani]

She nodded, a bit of a sad look on her face. She hated to think of Maris confining herself to avoid Trax...

"Thank you Maris." She said again softly

"I need to check with one other person before we go....the former Imperial who saved me on the station....I...want to make sure Danny's ok too...."

[GM Craig]

She nods. "I'll be around."

[GM Craig]

[1 CP for RP, mostly for handling a dangerous story situation well.]